Just FYI, I thank you for the feedback from my last elevator
pitch. I liked the feedback, but it will
not appear in this elevator pitch. I am out of the country thousands of miles
away on vacation and none of the taxis would allow me to film. The only transportation where I am are the
metro and buses but those don’t relate to my product. In addition, I didn’t pack any dress clothes on
this trip which is why I am casual. But
I want to let you know, I agree with a lot of the advice and will remember the
ways to improve my elevator pitch for future times.
I got even more useful feedback from elevator pitch number
2. People really like how my setting is
in a car which directly relates to my product.
One person suggested I should dress in more professional clothes. Another person suggested I should create a
hook at the beginning of my elevator pitch to attract the audience
attention. A third person suggested I
move back to the driver seat because it was easier to see.
Here is the link in case the embedded video doesn’t
work.
Hey Adam! This is your best pitch yet and I like how cohesive it sounds and the lighting and background look sleek. You barely ever stutter and explain some of the mechanics behind the seatbelt cover without getting to technical. I can't really think how you can make this better other then to practice it some more and pitch it to your buyers.
ReplyDeleteHi Adam,
ReplyDeleteNice work on improving your final pitch. I like how you incorporated my suggestion about starting off with more of a "hook." Even though you didn't have other clothes with you and you could not film in a vehicle, I think your standing position was a positive back-up choice. If you were to do this again in the future, that could even be something to consider: perhaps standing outside a vehicle, in the hot sun.
For future video pitches (which you will see again in Business Writing and Speaking, if you have not yet taken), I think it would help to outline your main points and rehearse the key ideas from that when you speak. I have found that the more times I did mine, the more comfortable I got with the entire process, so the extra rehearsal really pays off.
Susan
Hey Adam,
ReplyDeleteEven if you weren’t in your usual location, I think you did a good job. I think the posture you held and the way you communicated your ideas through movement and body language was excellent. Although you talked about how your product works in detail, your pitch was still easy to follow so that you wouldn’t lose your audience’s attention. I think that you could improve your pitch by practicing it a little more and focusing on the main points a little more.